Renting out an apartment in real life.

— Are we going to insure the apartment?
— Oh, no, why? Everything will be fine. Why burn extra money?

— The tenants asked us to buy a kettle, and they say the washing machine broke.
— What are they, children? Let them go to the store and buy themselves a new kettle! Give them money? Yeah, right! They’ll survive. The rent is ridiculous as it is.

— We do have to pay taxes.
— What taxes? Who even pays those? Nonsense. You just sign an 11-month lease and that’s it. If anyone comes by, let them say they’re distant relatives of mine, came to visit, and the owner isn’t home… I don’t know, they’ll think of something. I’m on a business trip!

— The tenants are moving out, we need to find new ones, we’ll be sitting without income for another two months. The realtor says the apartment is completely trashed now, needs renovation. Even a basic cosmetic job will be roughly half a million.
— Damn it! Where am I supposed to get that kind of money? That’s a year and a half of rent! Tell him to find tenants who’ll do the repairs themselves, or let them live like that — cramped but happy! We need some decent people, though, not just any of those…

— Did you account for inflation?
— Oh, quit it — inflation, inflation…

Real estate is the best investment!